Show don’t tell: The c4 surprise
Before: The cake was a mountain of sugar. Yum.
After: The spark whizzed down the sparkler. The little kids stared in awe at the sparkler.
The sparks kept going down to the cake. It would not stop. Already I knew something was wrong.
“Everybody down!!” I yelled.
Everything went slo-mo. A little kid just looked at me, unaware of any danger. BOOM! The cake blew up. I was blasted backwards, I hit the wall and crumpled. I heard something crack.
I was hit by a shower of red liqud. The room was covered in birthday blood.
The remains of the children fell to the floor with a thump.
WALT: Show don't tell
Learn: How to show not tell your stories so it is more gripping and exciting.
Create: A google document for your "show don't tell" story.
Share: On blog.
Hello Ken, Dylan here. Your story about The C4 surprise it was a bit brutal and funny at the same time. Maybe next time you could add a little reflection to it. Anyway keep up the great work, blog ya later.
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